Bent Kent

"Don't distract me.  I'm in the middle of a big boxing match.  I just took a left hook to the eye.  No worries though.  Haven't even left the ring; I'm just sitting on the ropes by my corner.  My trainer told me to bite down on this and he's gonna stitch it up.  I'll be back in the fight in no time."

Tommy Tee

"I been playin' for my whole life.  Months of mad skillz.  Tryin' to ball?"

Giant Darnell Tarritcio

"'Eh, ya' know, I just do what I do to do it while I'm busy doin' it.  ...  ....  Whassat?  What is it that I'm doin'?  Whatsit that I'm doin'?!  Giant Darnell Territcio does a lotsa stuff.  I gotsa roam through some new weeds, find some bitches to fuck, prance around 'cus I'm a deer, drink anything I can find, fuck some bitches... multiple times... you know, normal jank.  Whatsit to ya'?"

Bo-Fuddley McMisterson

"Typical Texas winter if ya' ask me.  Yep.  Just a yee-hawin' hogtie kinda season.  Kinda like an igloo halfway in the rear end of a barnyard skunk on the Ides of March of 1872.  Yep.  Yep... Yep-a-roo... Well... Tarnation!  This cold done did freeze my brain into a brain freeze.  I can't not even recall what it was I was tryin' to tell you folks... Oh well... I give up... these lips are snow lion'd-- er, I mean sealed."

Winston Jenkins VII

"Come on over to my mansion and we can share some rain water and fancy bugs.  Don't bring the kids though, I've got some special entertainment coming over for us; found "them" at the ol' country club swimming hole."